Rope bondage, in its variations called (Western) Bondage, Shibari or Kinbaku, is becoming more and more popular, and accordingly the community continues to grow. People from different backgrounds (e.g. dance, yoga, photography, art, BDSM, journalism, etc.) have different entry points to rope bondage and motivations for why they want to tie together. However, there is often a lack of background knowledge and precursory communication before a tying session. Thus, it unfortunately arises again and again, despite all the fun and pleasure, that a rope bondage session for one or both bondage partners becomes a negative experience or leads to an injury. With the growing interest, the number of people who have such an experience also rises, and they may feel alone here. Often beginners do not know how to deal with the situation, as they may feel helpless or overwhelmed.
We, experienced helpers from the Swiss bondage scene, have voluntarily joined forces to change this and have created this page together as a contact point for people seeking support.
Below is a list of documents designed to help bondage partners understand their own desires and expectations as well as risks and to obtain information about your bondage partner. We have also put together a FAQ on bondage.
It is important to talk openly, before and after each tying session, with the person who you tie with about mutual wishes and expectations, as well as your own physical and mental limits and illnesses.
If there has already been a problematic experience: A respectful discussion without accusations often clears up misunderstandings and solves many alleged problems.
If a problematic experience was not able to be resolved after discussing it with your bondage partner, it is time to get the opinion of an independent person from the bondage community.
Below and under "Contacts", you will find a list of people who either have their own bondage studio or many years of bondage experience. We are available either personally at the respective bondage meetings, by email or text message (only possible after previous establishment of contact via email) for questions, a short consultation or, if necessary, a mediation between the bondage partners.
If, in spite of previous conversations with the partner, psychological problems persist, or if it is a medical emergency due to persisting physical symptoms or due to a violent experience, we recommend to immediately go to the emergency of the nearest hospital. We recommend psychological evaluation in the case of new or intensified psychological problems (e.g. anxiety/ panic attacks, nightmares, night-time awakening with a racing heartbeat, sleep disorders, etc.).
During a tying session, only that what is wanted is allowed. Of course, rope bondage is an experience which develops a lot of closeness, but neither bondage partner automatically has the right to touch anywhere on the other person’s body.
If you don't know the rigger, don't meet them on your own: Take someone you trust with you. If the rigger refuses, don't do it anyway. You can also inform yourself about a rigger by asking in the community. Find out with whom the rigger has already tied and inquire with this person. No reasonable rigger will have a problem with you this asking. A good possibility to meet for the first time, and even to watch the rigger tie, is at an open bondage jam, which take place in several different regions of Switzerland.
Yes, if there is something wrong with the tying, it is very important that you inform your partner immediately! Nobody can read your thoughts. Only in this way can the bondage partner respond to your concerns by either improving the tying or ending it for the moment, so that no physical or mental injuries occur.
You most likely have a problem with a nerve in your arm that was under too long or too strong a pressure from the rope. This is one of the risks of tying. We recommend that you go to a neurologist. Please tell her openly and directly what happened, as this will enable her to find and treat the problem more quickly. The doctor is bound to patient confidentiality.
A rope bondage session can trigger reactions in a model, which might feel strange and possibly have never been experienced before. For example, people who were of the opinion that bondage cannot really affect them may suddenly slide into subspace (a feeling of floating or an out-of-body type experience). Excitement can also be a reaction that one does not expect. This experience may not be easy to process and a conversation with an experienced person can be very helpful. Under "Contacts" you will find such persons. Another possibility is to contact a psychologist.
Affects you and how you react to the simple tying. If the whole experience feels good, you can slowly increase the intensity with the rigger. So you can discover more and more what you like.
Ideally, it is best if you can clarify exactly what works and what doesn't with your bondage partner in advance. This increases security for both sides and helps to enjoy the shared experience. If you are in a session which develops in a direction which you do not like, then say something immediately and directly.
No, this is absolutely not necessary. Sex does not automatically belong to rope bondage. Many make a clear separation between sex and bondage, even if bondage can be a very exciting thing. You can be tied in clothes, preferably in tight but comfortable sports clothes and with a wire-free bra.
Angaben gemäß § 5 TMG